Our life forever changed when our twins arrived at 27 weeks, but that’s not where it all started.
My husband and I tried for years to get pregnant but as the years kept passing by and we could never conceive, we had to look elsewhere. After many surgeries and tests we were told we would not be able to conceive on our own. Our first attempt at IVF-ICSI was unsuccessful. A year later we tried again… we had 4 viable embryos to transfer. We transferred all four. For two weeks we waited. The test came back positive; I almost had a panic attack.
Six weeks later we found out we were having twins. Our dream came true but we were not out of the woods. We were at a high risk for a miscarriage as well as an early delivery. A week before the girls were born was a whirlwind. I was having stomach cramps which I thought was gas, it was contractions. The day before I was told to go to the ER (by then our 3rd trip in 3 months) I had severe back spasms, the kind that bring you to your knees... it was back labor. I had little spotting that evening and the next morning a little more. I was admitted to L&D that day and after the sonogram we were told I had an abrupted placenta (we had no idea how serious this could be) and low amniotic fluid in twin A.
They did everything to stop the delivery. I was on Magnesium Sulfate to try and prevent brain hemorrhaging in the twins. (That stuff has horrible side effects!) I was also on Terbutaline to stop the contractions and a steroid shot given every 6 hours to help mature the babies lungs. I lasted 28 hours but at 6:00 pm the following day things turned badly quickly. The placenta had completely abrupted and we had to get twin A out immediately. I had an emergency classic c-section and in 3 minutes the twins were born and rushed to the NICU.
Everything we had gone through just to get pregnant and now this. How could it be? Would our girls survive? We were scared, nervous, excited and anxious. I remember family and friends congratulating us. The whole time I was thinking, Why? We just had our babies 13 weeks early. We’re not even sure what the outcome will be. After I was finally able to see them I was shocked. They were so little. Meghan was 2 lbs 9 oz and Lauren 2 lbs 1 oz. They didn’t look like the normal cute full term baby. It wasn’t anything we expected but as parents we thought they were beautiful.
We were unbelievably blessed; the girls were only on the ventilator for 24 hours. Five days later we were able to hold them and what a great feeling it was. Our entire stay was a rollercoaster ride, we never knew what to expect. They had all the normal preemie stuff such as CLD and bradycardia/apnea. Meghan was also diagnosed with a PDA, PFO and a VSD. I never missed a day at the NICU. I was up there anywhere from 8-10 hours a day. I tried to take on as much responsibility as I possibly could. I made sure that I bathed them every bath day. I would kangaroo every other girl during the day. I started to feel like part of the NICU family. The nurses were my only social life.
About 6 weeks through our stay we were told the girls contracted MRSA. How could that be? MRSA? Both of our girls tested positive and were now in isolation. Anyone and everyone had to wear gowns and gloves except the parents. At first we were told we could not have any visitors and I was not happy about that. After much debate they allowed us to have some visitors but like the medical team they too would have to gown up and wear gloves. About a week later we were moved to the step down room which they now called the “dirty” room. We were not alone; there were 3 other babies that tested positive with MRSA. Fortunately they did not have the infection, they were just colonized.
Sometime during our stay Lauren started to show signs of an infection and was back on the ventilator. After a few days she was taken off the ventilator and showed no signs of an infection. Talk about a scary moment. The last thing a NICU parent wants to happen is to have their baby come down with an infection. (Thankfully the nurses and doctors look for early signs in order to prevent a serious illness or outcome.) My husband and I learned early on that our girls would often turn a shade of blue. I can remember walking into the NICU after eating lunch in the cafeteria and seeing all these nurses around Meghan’s isolate bagging her. After they increased her oxygen she was fine. Again, this may be an everyday occurrence but to a parent it’s the scariest thing to witness.
On another occasion, and just two weeks before coming home, I was bottle feeding Meghan. It was a wonderful moment. She would look up at me and just gaze into my eyes. I was the happiest I had ever been since being there. What an accomplishment too. An hour later as I was pumping I could see that Meghan was desatting. Within minutes I looked at her and noticed she was turning blue, a horrible color of blue. They tried to rub her back and feet but she was not responding. They finally had to bag her and after what seemed like minutes she started breathing. In one hour I went from being overwhelmed with joy to completely frightened and sobbing. A rollercoaster ride...
Meghan was off oxygen before Lauren but still had trouble eating and breathing. (Lauren would remain on oxygen 3 months after coming home.) 86 days in the NICU and we finally brought both girls home. Meghan came home on an apnea monitor and Lauren on oxygen and a cardio/apnea monitor. Shortly after being home help would arrive, but as the girls were still learning to eat and breathe at the same time we had numerous occasions where even at home they would still stop breathing and turn blue. We soon lost our help. This too got better and the girls would become pros at bottle feeding. Lauren suffered with severe reflux which caused her to cry, scream, get little sleep and have projectile vomitting. We increased her Prevacid, changed her from breast milk to formula and started her and Meghan on Simply Think. Things started to improve.
Every visit to Our Children’s House was a good visit. Our final eye appointment was our last. And after our last visit to the cardiologist, Meghan’s PDA and PFO were closed. The VSD was smaller but we won't have to come back for 2 years.
After a visit to the pediatrician and therapists we were told the girls would need DOC Bands. DOC Bands help shape the head symmetrically. In 2 ½ weeks they’ll be out of them and what a difference they have made!
Overall we were extremely lucky and blessed. Even so, our fears were not always just for our girls, but about the other parents that were suffering and all they were going through. There were times when we witnessed even nurses and doctors cry. It showed true emotion and dedication by the medical team.
I want to truly believe the reason why this happened wasn’t because of anything I or my husband did, but because someone knew we could handle it. That when all is said and done we would be stronger for it. Our little girls are about to celebrate their 1st birthday. It’s a celebration that at times I thought may not happen. For us their birthday isn’t just about them but about all the people that supported, prayed and took care of our girls while in the NICU. It’s our time to reflect on how blessed we are to have these two angels in our lives. It’s also a time to reflect on all the wonderful people we met while in the NICU. We still have a few more years until we know for sure that arriving early our girls won’t have some or no setbacks. We work with them every day and know that no matter what they’ll have the best life possible. There are numerous times that we look back to the day they were delivered and the time they spent in the NICU that we realize our girls are the true heroes. They were so small when they came into this world but fought very hard to stay in it.
By: Kim Murray